When You Are Tired of Trying to Be Enough | #061

The secret to the blessed life isn't escaping your limitations. It's accepting them.

Do you ever feel like you're constantly trying to be more?

Smarter. Stronger. More confident. More successful. More respected.

No matter how much you accomplish, it never feels like enough.

In Psalm 131, David reveals a surprising path to peace—not by escaping your limitations, but by embracing them. He compares himself to a weaned child, teaching us that maturity isn't getting everything we want. It's learning to trust God when we don't.

In this episode, you'll discover:

•  Why trying to be "enough" is an exhausting battle you'll never win. 
•  The hidden reason so many Christian men struggle with shame and self-doubt. 
•  What it really means to be humble. 
•  Why God gave us limitations—and how He uses them for our good. 
•  The powerful lesson behind David's comparison to a weaned child. 
•  How trusting God frees you from the pressure to prove yourself. 

If you've spent years wondering why you never feel like you're enough, this episode will help you discover the freedom that comes from trusting the God who is.

Time Stamps

0:00 The secret

1:00 Psalm 131

1:36 Accept what it means to be human

2:46 Having limitations is part of what it means to be human

3:36 The lesson behind becoming like a "weaned child"

4:53 The mature man is is the man who has found peace in his limitations

5:12 Trust God with your limitations

5:47 The idea that humans are enough has affected and infected even the Christian coaching industry

6:15 My claim to have overcome self-doubt was received as if I had just claimed to be Jesus Christ.

6:43 My confidence is not in myself, but in the Lord

7:28 The ultimate goal is not to become enough, but to realize God is enough

7:37 My challenge to you

8:11 Closing and resources

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Transcript

When You're Tired of Trying to Be Enough

The blessed life isn't found by escaping your limitations. It's found by accepting them.

Most of us spend our lives trying to escape them. We seem to always want to be more.

Solomon wrote, “The eyes of man are never satisfied” (Proverbs 27:20, NLT).

We wish I had been born in “Er.” We want to be smartEr, tallEr, smartEr, strongEr, and better lookingEr. Okay. The last one isn’t a word, but you get the point. 

I’m 5’ 10.” At least that’s what’s it says on my driver’s licenses, so it must be true. I weigh 155 pounds and have a 32’ waist. I wish I were 6’, weighed 190 pounds and had a 32” waist, and looked as good as Clint Eastwood in a cowboy hat. Okay. Did I just admit that publicly?

But I’m not alone in my vain desires, am I? We men don’t like limitations.

Most of our frustration comes from fighting the limits God never intended us to overcome.

There is a Psalm that addresses this quest for more in a way that restores joy and peace without being, getting, doing, or understanding everything. 

We can learn to live with our limitations.

“Lord, my heart is not proud; my eyes are not haughty. I don’t concern myself with matters too great or too awesome for me to grasp. Instead, I have calmed and quieted myself, like a weaned child who no longer cries for its mother’s milk. Yes, like a weaned child is my soul within me. O Israel, put your hope in the Lord— now and always.” (Psalm 131:1–3, NLT)

Here are three take-aways that will deliver us from the frustration of fighting limitations God never intended us to overcome.

1.        Accept what it means to be human.

“I don’t concern myself with matters too great or too awesome for me to grasp.”

Humans don’t know or understand everything.

One of the greatest and brightest minds, Isaac Newton, devoted much of his life to understanding the prophecies and predictions of Christ’s return, but even Newton had limitations.

Human’s can’t control everything.

I have a client who came home as a teenager and found all their family belongings piled up on the street curb. They had been evicted from their home. That embarrassment and shame of that moment was branded on his mind. Now he lives to protect his family against experiencing financial hardship and embarrassment.

You can’t be everything.

I used to be like the servant in Jesus’ parable of the three servants. I looked at those who were more talented than I and I wondered why God didn’t make me more talented, Why was I born into my family? Why couldn’t I have been born into a family that valued education and taught me more? I wished I were smarter and more talented.

Not knowing everything, not being able to control everything, not having all the talent and gifts is part of what it means to be human.

Humility and human are closely related ideas.

Humility is simply embracing what it means to be human.

That’s why David prayed, Lord, my heart is not proud; my eyes are not haughty.

Humility is where the blessed life begins.

“As the Scriptures say, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble” (James 4:6, NLT).

The blessed life starts with accepting what it means to be human.

Here’s the second observation…

2.        Learn to rest within your limitation.

David, King David, the GOAT, didn’t say, “I removed my limitations.”

He said “Instead, I have calmed and quieted myself, like a weaned child who no longer cries for its mother’s milk. Yes, like a weaned child is my soul within me.”

Notice where the change occurred. David didn’t calm his world.

“I have calmed and quieted myself.”

What does a baby do when the mother no longer nurses it? It cries because it lost something it thinks it can’t live without. Eventually the baby discovers something better.

We all cry over our limitations initially.

Many of us are still crying over the things we want:

·      I want to be smarter.

·      I want to be taller.

·      I want to be better looking.

·      I want to be stronger.

When their sense of limitation gets triggered they become anxious, or angry. They begin avoiding, controlling, being critical, and driven. 

The tendency is to hide who you are or to prove you are who want people to believe you are.

Maturity isn’t having or being everything you want, it is learning to quiet your soul when you realize you don’t have it.

No one can quiet your soul for you. Learning to live within your limitations is a choice each of us must make.

The mature man isn’t the man with the fewest limitations. The mature man is the man who has found peace within his limitations.

God will use even your limitation to guide you toward the life He created you to live.

That brings us to our third insight…

3.        Trust God with your limitations.

Looking at yourself is where you’ll feel the effects of your limitations. Looking to God is where you discover your true purpose and power.

When our limitations get exposed... We become anxious. It’s where we begin to hide. We get angry. We become controlling, critical, and driven. 

Suddenly we're trying to prove we're enough instead of resting in the God who is.

I know. That’s how I used to live.

But I’m not the only one to struggle with this. I see it is has affected and infected the entire coaching industry—even Christian coaching. It is the idea that we (humans) are enough.

I was on a call yesterday with another identity coaching ministry. I asked this Christian coach, “When did you win your battle over self-doubt?” They said, “I haven’t.” This person indicated that you’ll always run up against challenges that are bigger and bad’er than we are. When you do, you’ll have to fight through that “not enough” feeling each time you endure it.

I said, “I’ve won that battle.” They looked at me like I had just claimed to be Jesus. They clearly didn’t understand how that was possible.

I explained, “I treat obstacles and opposition like they are bullies. Bullies only have power as long as you face them alone. When I run up against something that stands in my way of doing what God called me to do, I look at the bully, and introduce it to my Father, who always has my back.

I shared, "I stopped looking at myself and began looking to God."

That's when I won the battle over believing that I was not enough.

Not because I finally became enough...

But because I finally realized God is enough.

The other coach said, “I’ve never looked at it that way.”

Most of us haven’t. We are affected and infected with the natural mindset. We think we have to figure it out. We have to make it happen.

I quieted my soul when I discovered, the answer to my limitations wasn't that I was enough.

The answer was discovering that God is enough.

David doesn't tell us to become smarter. He doesn't tell us to become stronger. He doesn't tell us to become limitless. He tells us, "Put your hope in the Lord—now and forever."

Maybe today you've spent years fighting the limits God never intended you to overcome.

Maybe you've wished for someone else's gifts...

someone else's personality...

someone else's opportunities...

someone else's story.

David would tell you:

Stop fighting what it means to be human.

Accept your limitations.

Quiet your soul.

Put your hope in the Lord.

Because peace isn't found when you finally become enough.

Peace is found when you discover that God is enough.

And when God is enough...

You're finally free to be the person He created you to be.